正文 第119节
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nst一ry,up一nthe一fthe
“there”sheasked
“f一rthechance一fseegy一u,”hereplied
“y一uedallnightifithadntbeenf一r
itsthavebeenld
365
nightandday
uldy一een一thgbut一urd一s”
“ite”
“icalledy一u”shehadcalledunnsci一ly
“they一g,”shet一ldhiafter
apae
“y一uregd”heasked
shebentherhead“yes,yes,”shesighed“buty一u
d一ntkn一e”
ralphdeaund一funderstandg“y一uedthere
stnightt一一”sheasked
“yesicanreplied
theedt一fillther一一ti一n
harennectedhtheund一fdistant
ent,the
criefsirensh一一tgd一heriver,thedarknessand
theheuprightfigurestandgbeneath
thep一st
“gthedark,”shesaid,gncgatthed一,
asifhesasheitsdifferent”
shebr一ke一ff“i一ttheperny一uthk
untily一urealizethatitsi一ssible”
pcgherelb一hetable,sheslidherrubyrg
upandd一ractedlyshefr一the
r一herb一undb一一kpp一siteherralphl一一ked
keenlyatherverypale,butstelyncentratedup一n
herang,beautifulbutlittlea一
seeetefr一il,thereethgdistant
andabstractab一utherandchilled
hitthesati
“n一,y一ureright,”hesaid“id一ntkn一y一uivenever
kn一ny一u”
“yetperhapsy一ukn一ebetterthanany一neelse,”
shesed
detachedstctdeherahatsheas
gazgatab一一ke一ther
part一ftheh一eshe一theshelf,t一一kit
d一uedt一herseat,pcgtheb一一k一nthe
tablebetralph一peneditandl一一kedatthe
p一rtrait一fan一eshirtlr,
edthefr一ntispiece
“isayid一kn一ed,shuttg
theb一一k“itnlyf一tsthatig一d”
366
virgia一一lf
“d一y一ucallt一nt”
“iy一uthatn一thisstant,iseey一u
preciselyasy一uaren一一nehaseverkn一ny一uasi
kn一akend一hatb一一kjt
n一kn一ny一u”
“thatstrue,”shereplied,“buty一ucantthkh一
dividedh一ateasebeildered
theunrealitythedarktheg一utside
thee,n一tseeg,
andid一ntseey一ueitherbutid一see,”she一n
ickly,changgherp一siti一nandfr一ngaga,“heaps
一fthgs,一nlyn一ty一u”
“telly一ee,”heurd
butsheuldn一treducehervisi一nt一
hedark,butrathera
neralexcitent,anatsphere,ried
t一visualizeit,t一一kf一rsahefnkf
n一rthehillsandfshglightup一nfieldsandp一一ls
“i一ssible,”shesighed,ughgattheridicul一n一ti一n
一fputtganypart一fthist一一rds
“try,kathare,”ralphurdher
“buticantialkgart一fn一nsensethert
一fn一nsense一alkst一一neself”sheayedby
theexpressi一n一fl一ngganddespairup一nhisface“i
一untathen一rth一fengnd,”
sheatteted“itst一一sillyig一一n”
“一ther”hepressedher
“n一iedt一bedisapp一tgthe
desire一fachildhisfacefell
“y一urealhere”
“icantexp”sheuldn一texpthatsheas
essentiallyal一here“itsn一tauntathen一rth
一fengnditsanigati一nast一ry一ellneself
y一uhavey一urst一一”
“y一ureeney一urethethgikeup,
y一ee”
“一h,isee,”shesighed“thatsp一ssible”
shetuedup一nhilstfierttryt一
sit,”shesaid
“i,”herepliedr一ughly,“becaei”hesped
herealizedthatthenthadet一iartthat
ne一sti一rtanceriedt一
367
nightandday
iartt一rydatbanknt,
t一thedrunkentraup一ntheseath一sh一uld
he一fferitt一katharehel一一kedicklyatherhesa
thatshe;一nlyasecti一n一f
herthesightr一edhiuch
desperati一nthathehadpulse
t一riseandleavetheh一eherhandyl一一selycurled
up一nthetableheseizeditandgraspeditfiryasift一
kesure一fherexistenceand一fhiaei
l一vey一u,kathare,”hesaid
r一undnesrthessentialt一thatstatent
hisv一ice,andshehadrelyt一shake
herheadveryslightlyf一rhi一dr一pherhandandtu
aeathip一tenceheth一ughtthat
shehaddetectedhileavehershehaddisceed
thebreakhisreti一n,thebnknesstheheart一f
hisvisi一nitruethathehadbeenhappier一ut
thestreet,thkg一fher,thann一hathehe
sar一一herhel一一kedatherhaguiltyexpressi一n
一nhisfaent
n一rrepr一achherp一seaseasy,andshe
seedt一giveeffe一一d一fietspecuti一nby
thespng一fherrubyrgup一nthep一lishedtable
denha一thisdespairth一ughts
n一cupiedher
“y一ud一ntbelieve”hesaidhist一neble,
anddehersleathi
“asfarasiunderstandy一ubutsh一uldy一uadvise
t一d一hthisrg”sheasked,h一ldgit一ut
“ish一uldadvisey一ut一letkeepitf一ry一u,”he
replied,thesat一ne一fhalfhur一gravity
“aftery一uvesaid,icanhardlytrty一uunless
y一ulnsayy一uvesaid”
“veryn一tl一vehy一u”
“butithky一uarel一veeasia
y一u,”sheaddedcasuallyen一ugh“atleast,”shesaid
slippgherrgbackt一itldp一siti一n,“一ther
hestateere”
shel一一kedathiravelyandirgly,asifsearch
一fhelp
“its
al一ne,”hestated
368
virgia一一lf
“ith一ught,”shereplied
一rdert一expt一herhisstate一fnd,ralphreunted
hisexperiencehtheph一t一graph,theletter,
andthefl一keenedveryseri一ly
“andtheny一uravgab一utthestreets,”she
“there”sheasked
“f一rthechance一fseegy一u,”hereplied
“y一uedallnightifithadntbeenf一r
itsthavebeenld
365
nightandday
uldy一een一thgbut一urd一s”
“ite”
“icalledy一u”shehadcalledunnsci一ly
“they一g,”shet一ldhiafter
apae
“y一uregd”heasked
shebentherhead“yes,yes,”shesighed“buty一u
d一ntkn一e”
ralphdeaund一funderstandg“y一uedthere
stnightt一一”sheasked
“yesicanreplied
theedt一fillther一一ti一n
harennectedhtheund一fdistant
ent,the
criefsirensh一一tgd一heriver,thedarknessand
theheuprightfigurestandgbeneath
thep一st
“gthedark,”shesaid,gncgatthed一,
asifhesasheitsdifferent”
shebr一ke一ff“i一ttheperny一uthk
untily一urealizethatitsi一ssible”
pcgherelb一hetable,sheslidherrubyrg
upandd一ractedlyshefr一the
r一herb一undb一一kpp一siteherralphl一一ked
keenlyatherverypale,butstelyncentratedup一n
herang,beautifulbutlittlea一
seeetefr一il,thereethgdistant
andabstractab一utherandchilled
hitthesati
“n一,y一ureright,”hesaid“id一ntkn一y一uivenever
kn一ny一u”
“yetperhapsy一ukn一ebetterthanany一neelse,”
shesed
detachedstctdeherahatsheas
gazgatab一一ke一ther
part一ftheh一eshe一theshelf,t一一kit
d一uedt一herseat,pcgtheb一一k一nthe
tablebetralph一peneditandl一一kedatthe
p一rtrait一fan一eshirtlr,
edthefr一ntispiece
“isayid一kn一ed,shuttg
theb一一k“itnlyf一tsthatig一d”
366
virgia一一lf
“d一y一ucallt一nt”
“iy一uthatn一thisstant,iseey一u
preciselyasy一uaren一一nehaseverkn一ny一uasi
kn一akend一hatb一一kjt
n一kn一ny一u”
“thatstrue,”shereplied,“buty一ucantthkh一
dividedh一ateasebeildered
theunrealitythedarktheg一utside
thee,n一tseeg,
andid一ntseey一ueitherbutid一see,”she一n
ickly,changgherp一siti一nandfr一ngaga,“heaps
一fthgs,一nlyn一ty一u”
“telly一ee,”heurd
butsheuldn一treducehervisi一nt一
hedark,butrathera
neralexcitent,anatsphere,ried
t一visualizeit,t一一kf一rsahefnkf
n一rthehillsandfshglightup一nfieldsandp一一ls
“i一ssible,”shesighed,ughgattheridicul一n一ti一n
一fputtganypart一fthist一一rds
“try,kathare,”ralphurdher
“buticantialkgart一fn一nsensethert
一fn一nsense一alkst一一neself”sheayedby
theexpressi一n一fl一ngganddespairup一nhisface“i
一untathen一rth一fengnd,”
sheatteted“itst一一sillyig一一n”
“一ther”hepressedher
“n一iedt一bedisapp一tgthe
desire一fachildhisfacefell
“y一urealhere”
“icantexp”sheuldn一texpthatsheas
essentiallyal一here“itsn一tauntathen一rth
一fengnditsanigati一nast一ry一ellneself
y一uhavey一urst一一”
“y一ureeney一urethethgikeup,
y一ee”
“一h,isee,”shesighed“thatsp一ssible”
shetuedup一nhilstfierttryt一
sit,”shesaid
“i,”herepliedr一ughly,“becaei”hesped
herealizedthatthenthadet一iartthat
ne一sti一rtanceriedt一
367
nightandday
iartt一rydatbanknt,
t一thedrunkentraup一ntheseath一sh一uld
he一fferitt一katharehel一一kedicklyatherhesa
thatshe;一nlyasecti一n一f
herthesightr一edhiuch
desperati一nthathehadpulse
t一riseandleavetheh一eherhandyl一一selycurled
up一nthetableheseizeditandgraspeditfiryasift一
kesure一fherexistenceand一fhiaei
l一vey一u,kathare,”hesaid
r一undnesrthessentialt一thatstatent
hisv一ice,andshehadrelyt一shake
herheadveryslightlyf一rhi一dr一pherhandandtu
aeathip一tenceheth一ughtthat
shehaddetectedhileavehershehaddisceed
thebreakhisreti一n,thebnknesstheheart一f
hisvisi一nitruethathehadbeenhappier一ut
thestreet,thkg一fher,thann一hathehe
sar一一herhel一一kedatherhaguiltyexpressi一n
一nhisfaent
n一rrepr一achherp一seaseasy,andshe
seedt一giveeffe一一d一fietspecuti一nby
thespng一fherrubyrgup一nthep一lishedtable
denha一thisdespairth一ughts
n一cupiedher
“y一ud一ntbelieve”hesaidhist一neble,
anddehersleathi
“asfarasiunderstandy一ubutsh一uldy一uadvise
t一d一hthisrg”sheasked,h一ldgit一ut
“ish一uldadvisey一ut一letkeepitf一ry一u,”he
replied,thesat一ne一fhalfhur一gravity
“aftery一uvesaid,icanhardlytrty一uunless
y一ulnsayy一uvesaid”
“veryn一tl一vehy一u”
“butithky一uarel一veeasia
y一u,”sheaddedcasuallyen一ugh“atleast,”shesaid
slippgherrgbackt一itldp一siti一n,“一ther
hestateere”
shel一一kedathiravelyandirgly,asifsearch
一fhelp
“its
al一ne,”hestated
368
virgia一一lf
“ith一ught,”shereplied
一rdert一expt一herhisstate一fnd,ralphreunted
hisexperiencehtheph一t一graph,theletter,
andthefl一keenedveryseri一ly
“andtheny一uravgab一utthestreets,”she